Firstly, I would just like us to show our appreciation to our guest speaker Mr. Allan Sims and to all our other guests who are attending the dinner this evening. Please can I ask you all to be upstanding and to raise your glasses to our guests.
I drafted the speech assuming that our chairman, Terry Harvey would be here. So the first part of the speech is dedicated to Terry as Dave Billing has assured me that Terry is definitely here with us in spirit.
Terry Harvey, Chairman of Old Reigatian Association Football Club, former second team captain and renowned bad boy of the club. After last year, when Terry did a little research on my own background and embarrassed me hugely, I thought it was only fair to embellish Terry's reputation this time around.
Terry's most successful period of playing with the ORs was when he was captain of the 2nd XI. Playing in midfield or on the right wing, Terry was an industrious player who was a great team man and was always prepared to put his neck on the line to support a teammate. In one match, a fellow Old Reigatian was injured but the referee refused to stop the game. Taking matters in to his own hands, Terry stormed up to the referee, grabbed the whistle from out of his mouth, threw it on the ground and proceeded to stamp it in to the mud. The game had to be stopped until the whistle could be retrieved, but at least our injured player could receive some attention. Terry's indiscipline also got him in to trouble in the local public houses. Banned from The Feathers in Merstham for persistently knocking over the cash till, Terry was also banned from The Red Lion in Reigate for swinging a condom full of beer around his head. Known for enjoying a beer or two, Terry's drinking habits have become more exotic in his later years. Having become fed up with his regular tipple of blackcurrant and lager, Terry has now graduated to the more sophisticated cocktail of brandy, lime and lemonade!
As a footballer, Terry was renowned for his incredibly ferocious shot. You would have thought that it would be an advantage to have a player in your side who could strike a ball with such power, but unfortunately Terry was unable to distinguish between a powerful drive and a precision pass. Consequently, when an ORs striker demanded a precision ball to feet they would be expecting a well-weighted pass to the side of the defender. What Terry would actually deliver would be a 50 miles per hour pass from 10 yards away, and Steve Fine has confessed that he has actually been knocked over at least twice by Terry's attempted delicate chips!
At this stage, I thought it was only fair to give you an update on the length of the speech for the sweepstake. Due to the current economic downturn I have recently been working with vice-captain, Steve Craddock on plans aimed at generating much needed extra funds. We were struggling to come up with ideas to bring in revenue when we remembered the sweepstake at the club dinner. So over the course of this week I have actually read this speech out from start to finish 12 times, the average length of the speech being 16 minutes 9 seconds with a standard deviation of plus or minus 8 seconds. Naturally, Steve has bet his money on this exact time, and from the list I was looking at a minute ago, Messrs Howell and Panton are also in with a shout. One person who does not have a prayer of winning is Garry Wait, with a somewhat elaborate guess of only seven minutes.
Anyway, on with the action. We have had some notable successes this year. Under my own captaincy, the 1st team failed to win anything! However, the 2's under Steve Fine had a storming run in the Oxted & District Junior Cup which resulted in them lifting the trophy, and Mick Timmons' 3rd team, were narrowly defeated in the final of the Charlwood Cup, having dispatched our very own 4th team earlier in the competition.
The 3rd team was the most consistent ORs side over the course of the season. Tim Carr always describes the third team as being full of players who know how to play but have lost that yard of pace, and early season results were encouraging. It was only when Steve Fine pinched the core of the 3s to play for the 2s that results started to fade. Having said that, Mick had managed to hold on to striker Greg Beech for over half the season, preventing Greg's promotion to the 2nd or 1st teams by claming that he lacked match sharpness. When he was promoted to the 2s he started scoring immediately so either he suddenly became match fit or Mick was taking the piss!
After the 3s lost disappointingly to Mickleham in the Charlwood Cup Final, Alan Harding, who had been substituted at half time and had already got changed, decided that he was not satisfied with his losers medal. Lining up behind the Mickleham side, Alan proceeded to shake the hand of the guy presenting the trophy and then picking up a winners medal. Nobody from Mickleham noticed so Alan now has both a winner's medal and a loser's medal for his efforts.
After three years in charge, Mick Timmons is stepping down as captain of the third team. This year has been the most successful of his reign, with the side finishing 5th having been in 2nd place for most of the season. Mick has asked that we give a mention to some of the regular 3rd team players that have turned out for him this year, so a big thank you from Mick to Rick Cole, Mark Allen, Ian Bennett, Andy Cassin, Tim Banks, Dave Cox, Justin Howick, Tim Carr, Tony Zanzottera and Alan Harding. One thing that the 3s are not going to miss is Mick's sense of direction when driving to away games. On one trip to St. Marys, based in Bexley, Mick took the wrong turning off the M25 and ended up diverting the side via Gatwick Airport, some 35 miles out of their way.
With Greg Beech being promoted to the 2nd team and forging a good understanding with golden boot man Paddy Kennedy, results in the second half of the season improved for Steve Fine's side. Having humiliatingly lost 8-0 to Whitgift in one of the notable low points, the 2s managed to turn this in to a 3-1 victory in the return fixture. As previously mentioned, the highlight of the season for the 2's was the Oxted & District Cup. Having easily seen off Oxted before Christmas, the semi-final was against a youthful Lingfield Reserves side down at Limpsfield. The side withstood some heavy pressure for the first 20 minutes, and then started to impose their own brand of football on the game (and I don't mean 50 yard punts up to Paddy). Gary Panton played superbly in the middle of the park and wingbacks David Eade and Mark Hanson were flying down the flanks. Meanwhile, up front Kennedy and Beech were actually looking to hold the ball up to relieve some pressure. An outstanding team performance saw us triumph 3-1 with goals from Paddy, Greg and Mark Hanson.
The final, held at Master Park in Oxted, was a cliffhanger. Paddy scored twice early on, the second a brave header which in my opinion was a blatant foul on the goalkeeper! Although Limpsfield pulled one back, Greg scored a great goal just before half time and we were hopeful of coasting through the second half. Unfortunately, despite a number of chances, we failed to kill the opposition off and Limpsfield scored a second with ten minutes to go. In true ORs style, we dug deep, Dale Taylor surviving a horror tackle and James Gregory remaining defiant in goal, and we lifted the trophy with a well-deserved 3-2 victory.
When I phoned up Alan Tully to request some highlights and amusing anecdotes of the 4th team season, Alan's immediate reply was that it would be anecdotes only as there weren't any highlights! Alan used a total of 50 players this year and he has assured me that this was due to injuries and unavailability rather than an attempt to mirror Sven Goran Eriksson's rotation policy. Struggling to get a regular side out, league results suffered. In the relegation battle against Tiffs, the referee further undermined team spirit before the game with his opening gambit to Alan: 'Nice to see you skipper - this really is the battle of the minnows, isn't it?' The major highlight of the 4th team season was Chris Brown's 75-yard wonder goal. Seeing one of his strikers demanding a long ball, Chris launched the ball forwards towards the opposition penalty area. Chris was initially disappointed with the result, but not as disappointed as the opposition goalkeeper who completely misjudged the flight of the ball, allowing it to bounce over his head in to an unguarded net.
The 5th team struggled early on as unavailability caused havoc in the lower sides. The best spell for the 5s was around Christmas, wining three games and narrowly losing 2-0 to Glyn, who eventually finished in the top two. Improving their points tally significantly from the previous year, the side has also helped in the development of a number of young players including Peter Croft, Rob Fieldhouse, Adrian Martin, Paul Grant and Jeremy Barnes. In the final game of the season, Scud finally received his comeuppance. After several years of dishing out the talcum powder, revenge was exacted when Scud's hair was sprayed in OR green much to the amusement of the St. Mary's players. This had such an effect that Scud failed to score and even passed on a couple of occasions!
After an encouraging pre-season, the 6th team started off with wins both in the league and in the cup. However, results then started to go against Carleton's side and it was not until the away game versus Sidcup that things started to improve. Two minutes to kick off and still a man light, John Allen made the first of his soon to be trademark 'change by the pitch side' appearances. Goal less at half time a scoring frenzy saw the sides locked together at 2-2 with both sides feeling that a point each was inevitable. We lost a player to injury, and on came Andy Bull for a rare appearance during an injury ravaged season. His instructions were to run around as much as possible and put pressure on their players. With only a few minutes on the clock Andy chased down a defender, who easily skipped past him. However, the defender forgot to take the ball with him and Andy hit a crisp shot past the flailing keeper to give the side a much needed win.
This win lead to the best period of the season for the 6's. A draw against St Marys and a win against the leagues whipping boys Sutton, followed. An away trip to Meads saw another good 4-3 victory and this run had given the 6's 11 points from a possible 15. Again, due to injuries and unavailability, the results faded towards the end of season. Carleton has asked that we give a special mention to Andy Bull, who despite being injured was present for every game helping out on the touchline, and for aiding in decision-making both on Saturdays and for the weekly scramble to put out eleven men.
The 1st team started positively. Despite an opening day loss to Woking, our early season League form was encouraging, winning the next three games. Grant Lowry and Ali Howell formed an explosive partnership up front and Andy Hazell and Andy Grimes were outstanding in wide midfield roles. In central midfield, Rob Dartnell was back to his best, and by Christmas we had reached our target of 20 points from 10 games. The most entertaining game for the 1's was against the undefeated Woking who had won eight on the bounce when we played them at The Priory in our last game before the Christmas break. Despite being behind three times, we managed to salvage a 3-3 draw which said a lot for our team spirit. Hamish made a great penalty save and superb goals from firstly David Eade and then Andy Grimes got us back on level terms.
We felt that we were in a strong position to push for promotion but disappointing results against Latymer and Kingsburians meant that we ended up in 5th. An enjoyable season, which also saw Keith Pearson step up from the 2s to earn a regular spot in the 1s at right back. Steve Craddock and Mark Hanson were as dependable as ever and Hamish was superb all season, well apart from when he threw the ball in his own net against Latymer!
After the Championship winning season last year, Nick Barclay decided to concentrate on coaching this year and Toby Vaughan took on the mantle of 7th team captain. Captain of the 7s is often a thankless task as you pick a side on a Monday that is slowly decimated during the course of the week as the prima donnas from the higher sides pull out. It is a great credit to Toby that he managed to get a side out on such a regular basis. The highlight of the season was surely a 5-2 victory over Dorking, followed up with a 2-1 win over Wilsons. Gary Waite has also helped Toby out, not least when he has managed to recruit last year's 1st team star player Allan Crooks to guest in the 7s on a few occasions.
There are a few more incidents that happened over the season that are worthy of a mention. Early on in the season, Rob Dartnell showed outstanding form as he played for the 3rd team in the first half of a 1-0 victory, then swapped pitches for the 2nd half as he joined the 1st team to engineer their 3-0 victory against Kingsburians. In September, the sexuality of the club was called in to question as Camp and Softley were selected in the same 6th XI, whilst in November, Tim Carr scored twice in a weekend, against Woking in the League on Saturday and against Ashurst Wood in the Cup on Sunday. Also in November, Ashley Mills' young daughter cried all the way through the second half of a game at The Priory. The 5th team thought it was because of their poor form until they realised that it was actually because her babysitter had been Roger Craddock. Finally, club Treasurer Rob Stapleton reinforced his reputation for keeping tight control of the finances when insisting that each player paid his full £5 subs, even though the game had been called off after only five minutes due to a waterlogged pitch.
So that was the year that was. I am also handing over the captaincy this year and I have to say that I have really enjoyed my two years in charge. I have already mentioned it in The Reigatian, but the people who run the ORs put a lot of effort in to the club and we are renowned throughout the League as being one of the most well run outfits. Thanks to Terry for his mad sense of humour which he displays at all of our meetings and also a huge thank you to Mark Eagleton who not only runs the website and the fantasy football league but has also produced the last few copies of The Reigatian.
So thank you all for your time and I wish the new captain all the very best for next season.
|
|